Life is tremendously ironic. It has a way of making fun of you with little to no effort whatsoever. I'm being laughed at on the regular. As has been the case throughout most of my life, I have run into the problem of empty pockets. I honestly have only had about 2-3 years of financial peace and prosperity since I left my grandparents home some 16 years ago. That's pitiful.
Lately, money runs through my fingers like water. This isn't because I'm on some super duper spending spree like the government. It's not because my date card is full and I'm flipping the bill for fine young ladies to keep me company. It's not that I'm a lazy single man and I eat out daily, cause that's only half the time. It's not even a lack of drive or motivation to work. I'm applying for part time/full time positions and picking up as much overtime as I can.
I'm a gadget guy but only in passing. So, my money's not going out the door to Best Buy or Sharper Image (if that even exist anymore). When I look over my bank statements there is actually very little activity. That makes the process all the more upsetting as my money goes so short. I shop at discount stores, never buy clothes, hardly go out, and I eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner at home (most of the time). So, what is it that's poking holes in my pockets?
First, it's the car I drive. I bought an 03' Ford Windstar a few years back as I had a family of four and thought it was the practical thing to do. Now I'm a single man with little use for a full sized vehicle. Gas prices are a killer as it cost me upwards of a $100 to fill up. And, I work 30 minutes away from home. Say hello to huge hole #1!
Second, it's these damn utilities! Heating cost during the winter in the MidWest are monstrous. Having been hit with a pretty hard winter I find myself continuing to pay for gas I used nearly six months ago. I just love that. Not to mention, the gas company has tried to attach additional fees in the range of $100 a pop for no particular reason other than that I don't pay my bill on time. Boy, that makes sense! Charge the guy that is struggling to pay more money cause that'll help him get it together. Needless to say, I'm still in the hole to old man winter. Say hello to hole #2!
Third, the cost of owning a home. Maybe a month or two back I happen to be in my basement when I noticed that there was as stream of water running from my hot water tank to my drain. That slow but steady leak has kept my water bill high. It's a catch 22 as I don't have the money to replace the tank and it's a struggle to get it because I have to keep the water on. Murphy's Law is in full swing here! Say hello to hole #3!
Fourth, my profession. I have chosen to work in the social service field. There is little to no money in this field save the few leadership spots at the top. Don't get me wrong I could handle a leadership spot with relative ease (handle the check even better). However, it's a game of politics. Despite my great work ethic, numerous compliments for inside and outside my agency (including families, clients, and county officials) there is no promotion anywhere in sight. Add to that the goofy rules on classification (where someone who was in the right place at the right time has a higher classification than I do even though I have significantly greater clinical experience) and it's a frustrating process. No money, no movement, no go. Say hello to hole #4.
Fifth, my own mismanagement of funds. There was a time in life, actually two times, where I have handled money very well. Bills were paid, credit was good, and there was something left over. Such times put me in a place to buy my home, support a family solely on my income, and invest for the future. Those times are long gone. Once I made a move to help people through a life of social service my income took a hit it has yet to recover from. I took a hit and major depression took hold. Responsibility was not at the forefront of my thoughts. I barely wanted to live much less do anything productive. I've blown considerable resources that could have kept me out of this mess. Unfortunately, when you don't want to live you give little thought to the future. Say hello to hole #5.
I'm trying desperately to fix my finances. I've applied and continue to apply for second jobs. Heck, if I could make the hours work I'd apply for a second full-time job. I want to rid myself of debt, fix my credit (though I have no plans of using it), get myself prepared for the next long term relationship, and sleep in peace knowing my finances are in order. Problem is, the economy sucks and the companies I've applied to that look promising are slow to hire. Hence, my incredible frustration. Well, I guess there's a silver lining, I don't have to worry about drowning (at least not in money).
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