56

The other night I hung out with a 56 year old Caucasian woman. In case you don't know, I'm a mid 30's Black man. It was just she and I at a two person table in a local bar and grill. It would seem like a weird mix but I had a great time.

We sat and discussed everything from work, education, family, and relationships. This meeting went on for over 3 hours. It was kind of strange in some ways as we were not particularly close in the past. We were co-workers with chance passings in the hallways.

What's even more funny is that she was talking about how she doesn't look 56. Instead, she looks early 40's. I'd have to agree with her on that as I was surprised to hear her age. She also said that she has a long history of dating men a decade or more younger than she is because of her young looks. She actually said she was struggling with an internal debate as to whether or not she should pursue or allow herself to be pursued by younger men.

She doesn't have anything against older men. She just said that they don't look like fun. They don't look like they have the energy to get out and live. She wasn't talking about sex. She made it clear that she's not looking for a young whipper snapper that can go all night in the sack. She's just looking for someone that wants to do something. I can't blame her for that.

Before I arrived at the bar and grill, I spoke with a close friend and told him who I was meeting. I told him I looked forward to the meeting but wished I was hanging out with a young hotti. Oddly enough, I found myself asking if I would be alright with dating a woman that much older than myself? After all, we hit it off. She was cool. She was fun. She was interesting. Yet and still, she's 23 years my senior.

When I really search myself I know I can't handle that age gap comfortably. I know some have and do. It's just not me. I've always felt that I was born at the wrong time. I've missed many great opportunities because the timing was all wrong. In some ways, I feel like this could have been one of them. I can't do the cougar or the cheetah thing. If we were talking purely sex, I might. But that's not who I am and even then I don't know that I could show up. 56 is hardly old, it's just too far away for me at this time.